So, You’re Going to Be a Big Brother…

Myron,

So you’ve know for a few weeks that Mommy is pregnant.  We talk about and pray for The Barnacle (that’s the baby’s nickname!) all the time.

And while your Mom and I are sure that you’ll make a great big brother (how cool is that!?!), the look on your face in this picture speaks volumes.

Here are a few things that it may be saying:

• Being a big brother comes with lots of responsibility.  That’s true Myron.  You’re going to have a little brother or sister who looks up to you.  S/he is going to see what you do, imitate some of it, and report some of it to your Mom and me.  But there’s also the responsibility of “being there” for your younger sibling.  When s/he is getting picked on, you’ll need to step up.  When s/he is in pain, you’ll need to be the shoulder to cry on.  And when s/he wants to play and have fun, you’ll need (and want) to be the best playmate ever!
• Being a big brother means that you’ll get a little less attention.  For the past year it’s just been you and us.  And that’s been pretty cool!  Well, you have seven more months to soak it in, because come August there’s going to be a little munchkin around here that will be taking up some of your precious Mommy and Daddy time.  But, son, this is okay.  Just like you needed lots of love and attention, The Barnacle will too.  You want her/him to grow up as well as you have, right?  Then, you’re going to have to share.  But if you feel left out, just let us know.  We’ll be happy to make special time just for you!
• Being a big brother means that all the people who love you are going to love The Barnacle too.  This isn’t a problem son.  Love is not like peanut butter or Doritos — when you share love, there’s not a stash that’s diminished.  In fact, according to my experience of life, the more love you share, the more you have to share.  So when your family members, your church community, and your friends show love to The Barnacle, don’t worry…there will be more than enough for you too!

Little man, I can’t wait to see what a great big brother you’re going to be!

Let’s do this!

 

Love,

Dad

I’m the Father of a One-Year Old!

Myron,

So, you don’t really like hats.  I’m not sure what to do with that bit of information because I LOVE hats!

But in all honesty, the picture above is the one moment during your one-year photoshoot where you were upset.  I should have known better since, after all, you’ve never liked hats.  But a friend not only GAVE you that hat, but she MADE it!

And I think there’s a lesson in that for you (abd for me too!) — when someone does something nice for you, you need to show them that their efforts have been noticed and that you’re grateful.

Son, gratitude will take you a long, long way in this world!

But I want to share another picture with you too from the same photoshoot.  Here it is:

I think this picture gets at your personality better — you lean in and you’re full of joy.

You lean in.

Hopefully this phrase (“lean in”) has gone by the wayside by the time you read this.  It might just be me, but I feel like this phrase is way over-used these days.  So who will noticed if I talk about it one more time!?

Leaning in, among other things, means going after life, being proactive.  And that’s you bud.  You never stop.  Nothing scares you.  And no new activity is too weird for you to try.  You have tremendous courage, so much so that your Mom and I get a bit scared sometimes!  But this courage has led to you learning new things, meeting new people, and having new experiences.

I really hope you never fail to lean in going forward!

You are full of joy.

Not 100% of the time.  You’re a human after all.  But almost all of the time you have the best attitude.  You’re happy, smiling, curious, and social.  People love being around you, they love holding you, and they just love you!

Your joy is infectious, rubbing off on those around you.  I’ve seen some owner of the stiffest upper lips crack a smile when they see you.

And I hope your ability to have and share joy continues to mark your life going forward.

 

Little man, I wish that there were words to express how blessed your Mom and I are to be your parents.  You teach us to lean in and have joy too!

This has been a crazy year…and we wouldn’t trade it for the world!  Thanks for everything Myron!

 

I love you,

Dad

Kisses

Myron,

Hey bud!  This will be a short note.  The video of you and Mommy above more or less speaks for itself.

But I do want to say this one thing: Only when your Mommy kisses me have I had better kisses than yours!

 

I love you!

Dad

Let’s Make This Official, Shall We?

Myron,

Hey man!  Dad here.  Just wanted to drop you a note to update you on what’s been going on.  Here it goes:

Since I last wrote to you lots of things have happened!

On December 10, 2015 we all (and by “we all” I mean you, Mom, Big Daddy, Granny, Aunt Melanie, and Me!) went to a courtroom with our adoption attorney and officially finalized your adoption.  Now that’s a pretty fancy phrase for an 11-month old but here’s what it means: You are now legally our son.  You’re ours forever and we’re yours forever.  That’s never going to change.  There’s never going to be a doubt about where you belong.  There will never be a moment that your Mom and I won’t have your back, not to mention all the rest of your family too!  You’re stuck with us…and, if I may say so myself, that’s a pretty good deal!  🙂

Later that same month you, Mom, and I drove to New Mexico to be with Abuelo, Grandma, Uncle Tim, Aunt Michelle, and Aunt Carolyn.  We had a blast!  We got to spend a whole day (like literally 24 hours) together in the car.  Then when we arrived in New Mexico there was snow on the ground!  We got to have fires in the fireplace, games were played, and Christmas was celebrated.  If there’s anything we want you to be clear about son it’s this: Christmas is about Jesus coming to be one of us.  Santa is cute and all.  Presents are nice.  And family is great!  But all of those things pale in comparison to the reality of Jesus coming for our sake.  That’s what Christmas is all about!  But I will admit that when it started snowing, that was pretty cool too!  🙂

And while we were driving to New Mexico you turned 11-months old.  That’s just crazy!  It feels like just yesterday you were born.  And maybe a few hours ago you learned to hold your head up, roll over, and crawl.  I can’t believe how big you’re getting!  Slow down little man!

I want to end with this: The picture I posted with this letter captures you beautifully.  It’s from your 11-month photoshoot.  First, look at your hands.  They’re moving a mile a minute, so fast that they’re blurry!  That’s you.  You are a mover and a shaker.  You simply don’t stop.  It’s really a blast!  And now look at your face.  See how serious you look?  That’s how you roll.  You put all you have into everything you do.  You never go halfway.  It’s all or nothing with you son!  And, lastly, look at the book you’re hitting.  That’s your first Bible.  You love that book.  You and I read it everyday (minus a few here and there).  You love hearing stories about Moses, Daniel, Jesus, and Paul.  I can already see the joy you get in learning about God’s love.  Don’t lose that son.  Don’t ever lose that.

Welp, that’s it for now.  I’ll write you again soon!

 

Love,

Dad

Gonna Teach You to Fly

Little Myron,

I love you little man!  It’s been a little while since I’ve written to you.  Sorry about that.  But, in all honesty, you’re mostly to blame.  I mean, geez, you’re just so cute and fun to play with!

And you’ve been teething.  A. Lot.

But I have a sane moment now to write to you, so that’s what I’m doing.  Your Mom and I are sitting here with our laptops on our laps, whodathunk!  She’s working on a class that she’s teaching and, well, I’m writing to you.  (Side note: Do they still have laptops?  Surely not, right?)

Anyway, a few days ago your Mom and I did your 10-month photoshoot.  And in the picture above your Mom caught a great shot of the two of us — you’re flying like batman (technically gliding since Batman can’t fly), and I’m helping you fly.

I love this pic!  I love how serious you are in it.  I love that you’re holding your favorite star, which just so happens to be pink!  And I love the look on my face.  Your Mom says I look encouraging and supportive, two words that I adore!

And, most importantly for the purposes of this letter at least, I’m literally helping you fly.

That’s what got me thinking.  And here’s the thought: Your Mom and I are gonna teach you to fly.

Our parents (Big Daddy and Granny and Abuelo and Grandma as you know them) taught us to fly too.  And there’s taught them, who were in turn taught too.  And so it goes.

Parents, in typical situations at least, teach their kids to fly, to soar out of the nest and explore the world on their own.  Sure, the young birds can fly back to the nest when needed…and the Mommy and Daddy birds will accept them.  But the point of teaching the young birds to fly is so that they’ll, well, fly!

So there’s going to come a time when all the teaching is over and it’s time for YOU to fly.  Now I need to be honest with you, that is going to be a difficult time for your Mom and I.  We love you and I’m sure that we’ll have become quite attached to you living with us.

But at the same time we know that you were intended to fly out there in the world, not sit around in the nest.

So sad or not, your Mom and I will set you free.

But you should know, you’re always welcome back at the nest.

But, little man, when that day comes, it’s your turn to unfurl your wings and explore this great world that God created.

Go for it with gusto!

 

I love you!

 

Dad

Happy Birthday to Daddy!

Little Myron,

Yesterday was my birthday.  And on my birthday I had a blast.

I got to spend most of it with you.  We ate together.  You watched me work out.  We played, read books, and crawled all over the place.

And you went with me to work.  And not just work, but a long and (at least to you) boring meeting.  And you handled yourself like a champ!  Thanks for that!

You know, on my birthday this year all I could think about was how blessed your Mom and I are to have you in my life.  I don’t need birthday presents and cake and parties.

Nope.

I have your Mom and you.  Outside of my relationship with Jesus, my parents, my sister, and our church family, there’s not much else I need.

I am blessed.

And I hope, actually your Mom and I both hope, that some of that blessing pours back into you.

Life lesson #5744161: God blesses us so that we can share his blessings with others.  We want to share our blessings with you, with our family and friends, with our neighbors, and with whomever else God brings across our paths

I mean, you have to always have your eyes open because you never know what might be coming your way.

Think about it: On September 10 of 2014 your Mom and I were on a little getaway for my birthday.  We were pondering about whether or not it was time to get started officially on filling out the foster-care-to-adoption paperwork.

We told our parents what we were doing and they were excited.  My dad told his siblings, including one of your great aunts.

Then your great aunt found out that her granddaughter was in a crisis pregnancy and was looking for a family within the family to agree to adopt her unborn baby when it was born.

Your great aunt remembered that Mom and I were getting ready to start an adoption process and told her daughter and granddaughter to contact us.

They did.  Just a few days after my birthday in 2014.

Now its 2015.  As you probably guessed (I hope…), we said yes that we would adopt you.  And here we are.

A year ago I didn’t have the slightest idea you were on your way to us, and now — today — I can’t imagine my life without you.

I love you Myron.  You are our miracle.  A gift from on high.

Happy birthday to Daddy indeed!

Love,

Dad

Father’s Day

Myron,

I love the photo that I put at the top of this letter.  I’m not sure whether you look like you’re being silly or like you’ve had a few to many adult beverages.  Either way, it’s a darn cute picture!

That pic was an outtake from your four-month “photoshoot”…which was over a month ago (you’re five months old now!).  And I didn’t post about it.  I didn’t write you a letter celebrating your fourth month of life.

I’m sorry.

I got busy with a thousand things, including be a dad to you and a husband to your Mom.

Hear me out for a second — I’m not the best father.  I’m not perfect.  I make mistakes.  I get angry sometimes.  I can be loud.  I forget things.  Despite my best efforts, I don’t always keep my promises.

But what I’ll always do my best for you and your Mom and I’ll make amends when I mess up.  I will always do those to things.  I promise.

And I’ll do them for lots of reasons.

1) I want to show you that I love you and when I hurt you because I’m stupid and imperfect, I want to make things right!

2) I had a great example of a humble and honest man in my dad (that old guy we call Granddad or, sometimes, Big Daddy) and he had a great example of a humble and honest man in his dad.  It’s my hope (and Granddad’s too) that you’ll be able to say the same thing to your children someday (if you have kids; no pressure!).

3) It’s the right thing to do.  Listen, being a good man (and, thus, a good father) means doing the right thing, even when you don’t want to, even when it highlights your weaknesses, even when you have to admit you’re wrong.

Little Myron, I never want Father’s Day to be a day on which you shower me with gifts and compliments.  I want it to be a day where you and I sit back and reflect for a minute about what it means to really be a good man.  That’s what I want Father’s Day to be about.

I want it to be a chance for me to teach you how to be a good man.

And I want Father’s Day to be your chance to remind, show, and inspire me to be a better man too.

Deal?

However, I couldn’t possibly put into words how awesome my first Father’s Day was!  You and your Mom helped me feel so special…and so did so many other people too!  So here’s all I can say: THANKS!

I love you little man!

Love,

Dad

Mother’s Day

Myron,

Today is your very first opportunity to observe Mother’s Day…and you have a great mom to celebrate!  She’s smart, loving, beautiful, and devoted.  And, little man, your Mom sets a beautiful example for you for what it looks like to follow Jesus.  She really is the best!

So to show her how much we love and respect her, we made her a decoupaged letter “M” with pictures of you on it!

We  gave her some silly things like gummi worms and donuts that she loves too!

And then we went to worship God with our friends.  While there one of our friends took a picture of the three of us.

Your first Mother’s Day has been so much fun!

But, Myron, I want you to know something important — not everyone loves Mother’s Day.  In fact, for a lot of people Mother’s Day is really difficult and not everyone feels like celebrating.

And here’s the important part, it’s okay that not everyone loves Mother’s Day.  And your job isn’t to judge the people who feel differently than people expect.  No; your job is to respect everyone and allow them to feel the feelings that they feel.  It’s not your place to tell people how to feel.

But don’t worry.  You have another job — to love your Mom and let her know…and not just on Mother’s Day…but every single day!

I love you!

Love,

Dad

Three Months!

Photo shoots are hard!

 

Myron,

 

So several days ago now you turned three months old.  Sorry I’m a little behind on writing you letters.  Taking care of you, being a husband, doing all my normal stuff, and trying to figure out my job situation has proven time consuming.

People tell me that this is to be expected — getting behind on things once I became a dad.  And while I can definitely see where they are coming from, I don’t know if I totally agree, at least not yet.

Being a parent to you has caused your Mom and I to reevaluate all of the things that we do.  It’s caused us to take a hard look at our priorities, values, and activities.  What is necessary, what is good for our health and well being, and what is fluff?

And all (or, to be honest, most) of that fluff is gone.

But we don’t miss it (at least not usually).  Instead of doing brainless things that serve no purpose, we spend time with you, we are more intentional about connecting with one another, and we invest our time in things that will help bring about desired outcomes in the future.

In some ways, having you has made our lives more simple.

And in other ways it’s made our lives more difficult.  And there’s nothing wrong with this.  It’s hard to prioritize things that matter.  So when I tell you that you just need to adjust your priorities, as if it’s no big deal, remind me of this letter!

Here’s the truth, doing what’s best is always the right course of action.  But that doesn’t mean that you won’t cry like it’s your three-month photo shoot (see photo above).  You will.

But, in the end, it will be worth it.  I promise.

 

I love you!

 

Love,

Dad

Twelve Weeks!

Myon,

 
You’re twelve weeks old!  Your Mom and I can’t believe this!  You’re growing and learning so much!

You can roll over like a champ, you’re starting to laugh at your Mom and I when we are being funny, and you have a really strong back (I mean, look at how high your head is in that picture!).

In fact, lots of people who meet you are really surprised at how old you are.  They think you must be older because are so good at things like holding your head up by yourself, making and keeping eye contact, and sleeping.

Sleeping.  Your Mom and I are so blessed by your ability to sleep!  On an average night, you sleep around ten hours.

TEN HOURS!

Our friends with kids are very impressed with your sleeping!  And the bags under my eyes have shrunk a ton lately thanks to your sleeping ability.

 

But don’t let all of this praise inflate your head too much.  There’s little that people find more annoying than an arrogant person.  So while you’re great, and you are!, you’re still a human.  You are not perfect.  And for everything you do well, there are things you don’t do well.

Instead, be humble.  You Mom and I will do our best to exemplify humility for you.  But we’ll not always do this well.  And we we mess it up and get a little to full of ourselves, maybe you’ll be the one to help bring us back down to earth!

Whatever the case, we love you and we want you to have a healthy view of yourself.  We want you to know your strengths and weakness and we want you to be able to be honest about both.

 

I love you!

 

Love,

Dad